Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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