I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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