We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
