Moan for me like Helen Keller
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize