But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
