Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
