"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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