Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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