Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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