How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
