do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
