He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
