In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
