I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize
