a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
