I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
And then he peed in my hair
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