i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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