Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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