I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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