i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You're a waste of cheezeits
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
