You're so nebulous sometimes
false alarm. still invincible.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize