:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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