nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.