David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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