Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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