how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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