yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
