if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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