i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
