so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
