***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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