Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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