he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
drinking out of a sandbucket again
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
