Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy