sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
