were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
