Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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