Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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