Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize