babies were throwing up all over the place
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize