i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
