Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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