as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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