we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize