I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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