going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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