Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
