NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
