bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
