Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
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