I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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